1. You are 3 years old or younger.
2. You are an infant or toddler.
3. You are in the very early developmental stages of human life.
4. You never experienced September 11, and you don’t know what it is because you can barely grasp basic tasks like walking and using a toilet.
5. You were born on or after January 1, 2010.
6. You were born three years, five months and seven days ago or more recently.
7. You cannot read this list because your brain is not developed enough for literacy of the English language.
8. You’ve never been on MySpace and you don’t know what that is. You cannot type or competently use a computer.
9. You don’t know who Michael Jordan is. You don’t know who most celebrities are because you’re in such an early stage of life that you can barely recognize and remember the people in your immediate and extended family.
10. You never knew Pluto as a planet. You don’t know what planets are or anything about the cosmos because you are a young child who has no concept of abstract ideas whatsoever.